It was end of May 2012 that we noticed small changes in you. You were forgetting some names of golfers that you regularly played golf with although you knew who they were. Then you started getting small seizures in your left arm. The Doctor thought it was a silent migraine. Then on the Saturday night you had a big seizure where you fell out of bed and banged your head. An ambulance was phoned and we were off to Aberdeen hospital. You were admitted for investigation. After lumbar puncture, EEG, chest exrays, MRI. And numerous other tests we were told there was a small 1cm undertermined lesion in the left temperal lobe on the brain but they weren't sure what it was. You were put on medicine for seizures and advised to stop working and stop driving. We never thought at the time that it was something so serious as cancer. We had booked a family holiday to go on a cruise but decided to cancel. We loved our holidays, you worked hard all year and looked forward to the next holiday. we never dreamed it would have been our last chance of a holiday together. We enjoyed time together as a family that summer .You continued to play some golf and to everyone who met you they wouldnt have known of any changes still looking a picture of health. Early August you were taken into hospital for a biopsy. You had done a lot of research and had said to me when we went for the results as long as its not a grade 4 we will be ok. But of the results had found you had glioblastama grade 4 tumour which needed to be treated with chemo and radiotherapy. We were told you were a unique case because it was small, you were young and healthy but there was no cure it was about keeping the tumour small and living with it. You were all set to start chemo/ radiotherapy in Aberdeen in early September but after having seen an MRI the consultant wanted to operate as the tumour had grown. You agreed to an awake craniotomy which was very brave of you, during the operation you were asked questions to make sure your speech and memory didnt get affected. It was a long wait for me during that operation and there was always risks so I was scared. after the operation you never complained and when I saw you after you had a smile on your face. You recovered well from the operation and was soon back out walking It was planned to wait four weeks and get started on the radiotherapy but during this time for some legal reasons although your mask was ready at Aberdeen we were told you had to go to Dundee for treatment. This delayed the treatment which finally started on the 23 October but instead of being able to travel daily to Aberdeen we had to live in Dundee Your work (total) were very good to you providing us with a flat to stay in. During the treatment you took pneumonia and then a large blood clot in the lungs. We were told you were lucky because you were so strong to have got through it. On 21st December we returned home for Christmas. The treatment had left you with a small appetite and foods no longer tasted good. Christmas Day you put on a brave face and sat with us at the table a while but the smells got to you. We appreciate you weren't feeling well but made the effort for us. You felt a bit better for a couple of weeks then in January things changed after just one round of the further 6 month chemo. You started to become dizzy, sickness and then mobility started to get poorer. Early February I was taken into hospital to speak to the consultant about the latest MRI along with my sister and yours we were told the worst news I ever have heard that nothing else could be done, you had weeks or months to live. I asked them about an operation being a possibility and the consultant agreed to see you for further assessment. You had a further operation to remove the tumour on 21st February. We were told it was to extend your life and wasn't a cure but we thought that maybe this time by some miracle things would be ok. You recovered well from the operation and were soon out walking again building yourself up, pushing yourself. We had a few days out with the girls and will remember the special memories. You continued on the temolozide chemo and managed to complete another 4 months and we all thought you were doing well but after the last course things started going wrong with mobility till eventually you couldn't walk this lasted for 7 weeks till you died with me and your 2 daughters at you side. Even on the morning of your death you were having a laugh, smiling and enjoying your food. Although we were told there was no cure we never believed that you would leave us John. I miss you so much, you are around me all the time xx